demiurgic (strawberryzink) wrote,
demiurgic
strawberryzink

Fuck You

If anyone tells me: "Well you choose to do that..no one told you to do it" just fuck yourself up and leave me alone because I don't want to fucking see your face, or know who you are, and please just delete me from your friends list if you think that too.



I am not searching for sympathy or advice, or anything like that. I just want someone to listen, or in this case read. Right now I honestly feel like going to get my ears pierced again...anything that will bring physical pain to take away emotional pain. I HATE MY LIFE at the moment. I feel as though summer school was a mistake. I am here writing another blog that no one reads because it allows me to let out my emotions without having my roomate see the tears flow down my face. I feel as though I have to bottleup my emotion inside and keep it there hidden from view. Well if you read this I guess you know that some where inside of me is a glassbottle just filling up with so many feelings, and one day it will break, and I am not sure what is going to happen. An overweight imbecile. Me....Maybe a week from today things will get better.

I guess I was just hurt today really badly by someone I love. He made me feel dumb, and like someone who is impaired. I didn't receive a fully apology...now that my roomie is asleep my tears finally just erupted. "Living life...don't you cry...my life...pain is god. Living life, paingful thoughts occur..knowing me again I am wrong.......someone save me...now these memories still I hide, they bury me"- JD

At least these classes will all be over soon, the sooner I can open the cap on my bottle a bit to let some pressure out.



Hate me or love me,

Jessica
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